Cat's so called life

Welcome to my world. I *just* vacuumed... Wipe your feet before you come in.

Monday, September 13, 2010

@*$*!*$*% rat bastard!!!

Open letter to the asshole who hit my car and drove away:

Dear scumbag,

Monday mornings are NOT good for me. My kids are slow to get up & get moving, I'm usually yelling at them as we run out the door to get to school on time. After getting them in the car & buckled up, backpacks stowed in the front seat, I walk around to the drivers side, and Lo & Behold....a GIANT dent & scrape!! What a glorious sight to see!! Thank you soooo much for driving away after you hit it.

Since you didn't bother leaving me your insurance info, I'm going to assume that you don't have any. However, at the VERY least, the decent thing would have been to leave a note saying that YOU'RE F'ING SORRY!! Didn't need to leave your name & phone number, just a simple "I'm sorry" would have made the whole friggin thing less screamy for me. I hope that my neighbors don't think any less of me (HA!!) for the foul language that I was flinging around this morning out on the street.

Maybe you were at the bar for the stupid loser Eagles game and had one too many. Maybe you just didn't see the black car. It was rather dark last night. Nights *do* tend to be dark around here. I guess the tan top wasn't visible either.

I'm thinking that it was alcohol related since you smashed into the DOOR of the car, not the front-quarter panel, where one would theoretically hit a car while trying to park in front of me, or the rear quarter-panel if you were trying to pull in behind me. So I'm thinking you swerved for some unknown reason (maybe one of my lovely neighbor's stupid, outside cats ran into the road) and hit my car.

Guess who's going to have to pay for this?? Yep. Since I only carry liability on a 14 year old car, that would be me.
In a way, you will too because I am going to get all CSI tonight & check every friggin' bumper in the neighborhood. If you have black transfer on your truck (the damage is right below the rear view mirror so I know it's a larger vehicle) I will slash your goddamn tires.

Have a nice day.

Black convertible parked on Toll Street.

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Tattoo You

Joe has been talking about getting a tattoo. I just roll my eyes every time he brings it up.

He wants a four-leaf clover with each of our names in a leaf. I'm pretty sure it's never gonna happen because he doesn't like pain and I make my "ewwwww, tattoo" face every time he says it.

Well. Saturday evening we take the kids to boardwalk in Ocean City. Me & Maggie go one way (to the spinny, tilty, fast roller-coaster-type rides) and Joe takes Will to the round and round "monster-trucks", the choo choo train monorail, carousel, little bumper-car type rides.

We meet at our pre-arranged location (Fun-house) at the specified time, Maggie is running as fast as she can across the "Rickety Bridge" when the boys showed up. Joe says, "Hey Willz, show Mommy what you & Daddy did tonight."
My little blonde-haired, blue-eyed baby boy pulls up his shirt-sleeve aaannnnddd........

My men got matching tats.

It should only last about a week. I'm sure it will be pretty much gone after the holiday weekend as we'll be back down the shore from Thursday through Tuesday.

Sand, Sun, Saltwater, and the pool at the campground should bleach it before school starts.
Good thing too, since he's running out of sleeveless t-shirts.

Monday, July 12, 2010

The Good Dream Hat

I am loving seven. Maggie has been so damn cute lately, I wish she would stay this age forever.
Last night I put her to bed a little after 8:00 with a Junie B. Jones book and told her that she could read in bed for a little while. I could hear her giggling to herself and then it got quiet.
I was sitting downstairs watching Leverage, and she came creeping down the steps, telling me that she "felt like she was going to have a bad dream." I walked her back up to her room, re-sprayed some "good-dream spray" (rose scented linen spray) tucked her back in, and re-adjusted the animals on her bed. She asked if Roger-Belle could sleep on her pillow. Of course I agreed, telling her that a Tiger was the perfect (purrfect?) choice to have sleep near your head if you were worried about bad dreams sneaking in. She was worried that bad dreams came in bubbles and popped near your ears so that they could climb in your ears and up into your brain.
I had a fantastic idea! Stop laughing. I did! I went to her closet & pulled out a hat. I was looking for the one with the ear flaps, but I couldn't find it. We went with the pink polar fleece. I pulled the hat tightly over her ears & kissed her goodnight.
20 minutes later, Joe came home from work & I was telling him about the bad-dream-drama. He went up to check on her & snapped this pic.

She was sound asleep with Roger-Belle (I don't know WHERE she came up with this name) guarding her & her little hands holding on the Good-Dream-Hat.
My kid is funny. And cute. And sweet. And a little weird.

Thursday, July 08, 2010

Cancer is a Water Sign

Lord have mercy.........

Maggie has conquered her fear of the diving board.

What this picture doesn't show is me standing ON the ladder, waiting to dive in to rescue her.
Seconds later, she pops up, yells to me that , "THAT WAS AWESOME!!!!" and proceeds to doggie-paddle to the ladder.

She went off about 8 more times after that.

Wednesday, June 02, 2010

Memorial Day 2010

Ahhh, Memorial day. The un-official start of summer.

A day to pause and say “Thank you” to the brave men and women who fought and died to defend our freedom. A day for parades, flying the flag high with pride, water ice and pony rides, fireworks and barbeques. The kids and I went to the beach.

These kids are so silly

My children made me a cherry-banana-strawberry-apple pie. The broken pieces of shell are Rainbow Sprinkles. The seagrass are candles.
Wow. I need a pedicure. And a pair of flip-flops that *don't* give me a blister. Band-aids on the beach are soooper-sexxxy, no??

I love pictures of her when she doesn't realize I'm taking her picture.

Otherwise, I get this.

We are in soooo much trouble when she starts dating. We only have another 23 years to prepare for that.

God, my baby is getting so BIG!! I can't believe he's almost 4.


Thursday, April 22, 2010

Sometimes husbands are more trouble than they're worth

Why am I married??

My sister-in-law is throwing a 30th birthday party for her boyfriend. She mentioned it in passing a few weeks ago. Last night Joe was on the phone with his sister & I overheard him telling her that he “has to work 9-5 at Villanova and then he’ll take the train into the city for the party and either take the train home or ask his brother for a ride.” About a half an hour later, we were watching TV & he was telling me about his hectic schedule for the rest of the week when casually turns to me & asks, “Oh, did you want to go too?”

Seriously?? It’s pretty plain to me that he didn’t think I’d be there as I’m certainly not driving into center-city with my kids by myself at night and since he was going to take the train & get a ride home with his brother, he knew I wasn’t planning on being there. Plus, his sister never ASKED me if I wanted to go; she was just telling me about the party plans. There was no actual invitation extended to me, so therefore, I assumed (I know, I know when one assumes…) that it was a “friends” type of party. However, that is not my gripe.

If a family member of yours extends and invitation to you, do you automatically assume that it is a FAMILY invitation or just you? Sometimes I think my husband forgets that he is a part of a COUPLE. We are married. There are the 2 of us AND our children.

It’s a damn good thing that our next-door neighbor is throwing a purse-party that evening so I will have something to do besides sit around & stew about Joe being out having fun without me.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

What the HELL is WRONG with me???!

I'm not sleeping well. Usually, at 11:00 pm my body just shuts-down. I go upstairs, wash my face, brush my teeth & climb into bed. I usually fall asleep within minutes of getting into bed. For the past 3 weeks, I've been lying there, listening to Joes light snore, hearing Will breathe in his room (he doesn't like his door closed) I can hear Maggie talking in her sleep, I hear the neighbors running (don't they EVER WALK up & down a flight of stairs?) next door.

I look like shit. The circles under my eyes are so dark. I look like Uncle Fester.

Even my kids have noticed. "Mommy....why you haf all dat brown unner your eyes?"

I bought Loreal Eye treatment, Olay's lightener with concealer, Physician's formula yellow concealer & some regular concealer. I still look like death warmed over.

I've tried Tylenol PM, a glass of wine (or 2) and even going to bed a little bit earlier.

Why can't I sleeeeep????